Lolo Milong, Uncle Junior and Dad Elliott

Lolo Milong and Daddy



Lolo Milong and Uncle Junior



Uncle Junior and Daddy



Lolo Milong and his friend Man Yanong Nuneza

Like I said before, I knew very little about him. I visit his grave at Mt. Olivet Cemetery twice a year and have conversations with his spirit. I always tell him how much Lola loved him and how she missed him. He died in November, 1953.

I thought I would post some of the pictures that Jewel Nuneza sent me. I am forever grateful to her for sharing these photos. I hope and pray that we would connect face to face one day. There is so much I would like to know about Lolo Milong.

Apparently Man Yanong Nuneza was one of Lolo Milong's best friends. He lived with the Nuneza family for a long time until he died.

All three - Lolo Milong, Daddy and Uncle Junior are now gone - I do miss them, miss what was and who they were to me and what might have been - if our stories had a differnt plot.

Emily's Visit - No Pictures - Forgot the Camera

Well, Emily, Donna and I connected on Friday, February 8; but did not get to see each other until Monday, February 11th. Had a lot of things going on my plate, collapsed after church on Sunday.

Talked to Donna a lot and Emily as well, - when I could. Stayed at Lauren's house for some TLC. John is a good cook and Dominic always, always cheers my spirits.

Donna and Emily came to the university on Monday. We stole away to Ann Arbor - taking one car so we can all talk. It was great fun to get caught up with each other. Leto joined us in Ann Arbor and treated us to a great lunch.

Haven't had a face-to-face visit with Emily for a while - I think our paths crossed in San Francisco a few years ago. We try to maintain contact through e-amil and Facebook. Thank goodness for the new technologies!

It was just so great to see her in person. We talked about history (both family and national history) after all - national history is a compilation of individual and family histories. Talked at length about our family - how much it has grown and expanded, the efforts to preserve legacy and of course who's who. Talked about Mecmec's project and website getting the family connected.

I am currently gathering photos - have some restored but restoration proved to be very expensive - so it is a very slow process.

Of course, in the excitement, none of us remembered to bring our cameras.

Complicated - Subayon

It is complicated is often used in "Facebook" regarding relationship status.I think it means that it is difficult to explain.

I grew up being difficult to explain. I can remember the expressions;the looks in the faces when I was introduced or when someone asked about me. In my day, people were interested in family lineage.

I am the daughter of Teresa Montecillo and Juan Rojo. No, they did not marry - so I am illegitimate - a stigma I carried when I was growing up. I never felt good enough. This was very hard on me, causing alienation towards some of the gossipy branch of the PanMon Clan. It was Tata Batyong, Lola Sayong and Lola Eliang who constantly assured my inclusion as a Montecillo when I cried about it.

Tata Batyong would say things like "tell them you are a Montecillo, the rest is none of their business."

Lola Bette was also hard to explain. I was often asked where she came from - she was not Catmonanon nor Cebuano for that matter. Lolo Milong brought her to Catmon from Detroit. Although, I spent a lot of time with members of her family - she would always tell me to leave her family out of the conversation. So her family came and went, when they visited. We visited Bogo and Mabolo.

People often asked what my plans are for the holidays. I spend my holidays with family - my complicated family. Which family?

So here are pieces to the puzzle. Subayon.

Mama Teresa married Dad Ron Elliott. Mama and Daddy had Donna. So now, I have a sister on Mama's side. Dad Elliott's rule is that there are "no steps" - so Donna and I never had the "step" relationship.

I married Lee Rankine - Leto, Rosanne and Lauren are the gifts from the union.We were married for 20+ years. Lauren got together with Mike Hallam and had Dominic. Leto got together with Tracy - so came Manny Henry-Rankine. Rosanne got together with Creek Noke - so we now have Zachary and Gus Rankine-Noke. I love them all!

After Mama Teresa died,Dad Elliott married Mom Josephine Miller Currie bringing her three children - Julie, Karen and Roger. Then Michael was born. Donna married a Rhadigan and had Nicole. Then she married Frank Hayden - Garrett and Brandon came along. Nicole married Simon Haidi - their children are Mina, Gabriel and Alexander.

Julie married a Badamo and had Gina and Joey. Gina married Scott Barber. The children are Shelby, Megan and Gino.Karen married Mario Del Grecco. Michael married Carrie. Roger never married.

I have spent the last 30+ Christmases with this wonderfully blended family. I spend almost all the other American traditional family holidays with them.

I learned to "subay" from Lola Miliang de Dios and from the countless birthdays, weddings,"canta misa" ordinations and of course, funerals - mostly the Montecillo side - that we attended from Catmon to Sogod to Borbon to Naga to Tuburan to Carcar -wherever Montecillo's lived.The experiences gave me a solid Montecillo grounding.

This is where I learned that families can be very complicated but very rewarding if there is cohesion.

Tatay Juan Rojo is ill in San Francisco - I have never spent Christmas with him or my siblings on the Rojo side. Nanay Julia is a Menchavez - so I am blood related to my brothers and sisters there. On the Menchavez side, they are my cousins. I am trying to decide whether to fly out tomorrow or on Christmas Day. I am conflicted on how to allocate my meager resources of time and dollars.

I will pray - I still have three families from Christmas for Kids to finish up.

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